A silent du'a

All praises are for You Allah
How I know that You are there
For sinful though I surely am
Your displeasure I cannot bear

Never till this moment
Did I realize how much I've strayed
Never was I more conscious
Of the times I should have prayed

O Allah! Forgive me
Save me from the fire of Hell
Forgive me as You did my ancestors
From Jannah though they fell

O Allah! Protect me from all evil
For my soul is frail and weak
Let me not falter ever
For Jannah's the abode I seek

My actions once were guided -
By my faith which once was strong
O Allah! Please give me guidance
What happened? What went wrong?

Each footstep that I used to take
I took with You by my side
The Qur'an was my close companion -
My healing and my guide

O Allah! Please help me
For I don't understand and thus, I fear
What happened to all those days
When I never doubted You were near?

I sit here and I wonder Oh Allah,
Why did I fall so low?
What happened to my faith Allah?
Where did my Iman go?

How I yearn for those days Allah
For I know that the Day comes near
When each soul receives its just rewards
And Truth stands sparkling clear

In this short life of ours
So often does sin seem right
Falsehood seems to be the truth
Like day confused with night

Life is like a spider's web Allah
We get caught in its tricky snare
So often are we disillusioned
Time for prayer we cannot spare

We are sinful creatures Allah
So please forgive us when we wrong
For the road to Jannah is rocky
And the journey seems arduously long

O Allah! Our Creator,
Have mercy on us on Judgement Day
Please guide us with our steps in life
And let us not ever lose our way

All praises are for You Allah
I know that You are near
I know that You have read my heart
And my words I know You hear

~Anonymous ~


Answer To Non Muslims, Common Questions About Islam :PART1

Why is a man allowed to have more than one wife in Islam? i.e. why is polygamy allowed in Islam?

1. Definition of Polygamy
Polygamy means a system of marriage whereby one person has more than one spouse. Polygamy can be of two types. One is polygyny where a man marries more than one woman, and the other is polyandry, where a woman marries more than one man. In Islam, limited polygyny is permitted; whereas polyandry is completely prohibited. Now coming to the original question, why is a man allowed to have more thanone wife?

2. The Qur’an is the only religious scripture in the world that says, “marry only one”.
The Qur’an is the only religious book, on the face of this earth, that contains the phrase ‘marry only one’. There is no other religious book that instructs men to have only one wife. In none of the other religious scriptures, whether it be the Vedas, the Ramayan, the Mahabharat, the Geeta, the Talmud or the Bible does one find a restriction on the number of wives. According to these scriptures one can marry as many as one wishes. It was only later, that the Hindu priests and the Christian Church restricted the number of wives to one. Many Hindu religious personalities, according to their scriptures, had multiple wives. King Dashrat, the father of Rama, had more than one wife. Krishna had several wives.

In earlier times, Christian men were permitted as many wives as they wished, since the Bible puts no restriction on the number of wives. It was only a few centuries ago that the Church restricted the number of wives to one. Polygyny is permitted in Judaism. According to Talmudic law, Abraham had three wives, and Solomon had hundreds of wives. The practice of polygyny continued till Rabbi Gershom ben Yehudah (960 C.E to 1030 C.E) issued an edict against it. The Jewish Sephardic communities living in Muslim countries continued the practice till as late as 1950, until an Act of the Chief Rabbinate of Israel extended the ban on marrying more than one wife.

(*Interesting Note:- As per the 1975 census of India Hindus are more polygynous than Muslims. The report of the ‘Committee of The Status of Woman in Islam’, published in 1975 mentions on page numbers 66 and 67 that the percentage of polygamous marriages between the years 1951 and 1961 was 5.06% among the Hindus and only 4.31% among the Muslims. Accord to Indian law only Muslim men are permitted to have more than one wife. illegal for any non-Muslim in India to have more than one wife. Despite it be illegal, Hindus have more multiple wives as compared to Muslims. Earlier, it was no restriction even on Hindu men with respect to the number of wife allowed. It was only in 1954, when the Hindu Marriage Act was passed then became illegal for a Hindu to have more than one wife. At present it is the Indian Law that restricts a Hindu man from having more than one wife and not Hindu scriptures.)

Let us now analyse why Islam allows a man to have more than one wife.

3. Qur’an permits limited polygyny
As I mentioned earlier, Qur’an is the only religious book on the face of the earth that says ‘marry only one’. The context of this phrase is the following verse from Surah Nisa of the Glorious Qur’an:
“Marry women of your choice, two, or three, or four; but if ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly (with them), then only one.” [Al-Qur’an 4:3]

Before the Qur’an was revealed, there was no upper limit for polygyny and many men had scores of wives, some even hundreds. Islam put an upper limit of four wives. Islam gives a man permission to marry two, three or four women only on the condition that he deals justly with them.In the same chapter i.e. Surah Nisa verse 129 says:
“Ye are never able to be fair and just as between women....” [Al-Qur’an 4:129]

Therefore polygyny is not a rule but an exception. Many people are under the misconception that it is compulsory for a Muslim man to have more than one wife. Broadly, Islam has five categories of Do’s and Don’ts:
(i) ‘Fard’ i.e. compulsory or obligatory
(ii) ‘Mustahab’ i.e. recommended or encouraged
(iii) ‘Mubah’ i.e. permissible or allowed
(iv) ‘Makruh’ i.e. not recommended or discouraged
(v) ‘Haraam’ i.e. prohibited or forbidden

Polygyny falls in the middle category of things that are permissible. It cannot be said that a Muslim who has two, three or four wives is a better Muslim as compared to a Muslim who has only one wife.

4. Average life span of females is more than that of males
By nature males and females are born in approximately the same ratio. A female child has more immunity than a male child. A female child can fight the germs and diseases better than the male child. For this reason, during the pediatric age itself there are more deaths among males as compared to the females.
During wars, there are more men killed as compared to women. More men die due to accidents and diseases than women. The average life span of females is more than that of males, and at any given time one finds more widows in the world than widowers.

5. India has more male population than female due to female foeticide and infanticide
India is one of the few countries, along with the other neighbouring countries, in which the female population is less than the male population. The reason lies in the high rate of female infanticide in India, and the fact that more than one million female foetuses are aborted every year in this country, after they are identified as females. If this evil practice is stopped, then India too will have more females as compared to males.

6. World female population is more than male population
In the USA, women outnumber men by 7.8 million. New York alone has one million more females as compared to the number of males, and of the male population of New York one-third are gays i.e sodomites. The U.S.A as a whole has more than twenty-five million gays. This means that these people do not wish to marry women. Great Britain has four million more females as compared to males. Germany has five million more females as compared to males. Russia has nine million more females than males. God alone knows how many million more females there are in the whole world as compared to males.

7. Restricting each and every man to have only one wife is not practical
Even if every man got married to one woman, there would still be more than thirty million females in U.S.A who would not be able to get husbands (considering that America has twenty five million gays). There would be more than four million females in Great Britain, 5 million females in Germany and nine million females in Russia alone who would not be able to find a husband. Suppose my sister happens to be one of the unmarried women living in USA, or suppose your sister happens to be one of the unmarried women in USA. The only two options remaining for her are that she either marries a man who already has a wife or becomes 'public property'. There is no other option. All those who are modest will opt for the first.
Most women would not like to share their husband with other women. But in Islam when the situation deems it really necessary Muslim women in due faith could bear a small personal loss to prevent a greater loss of letting other Muslim sisters becoming 'public properties'.

8. Marring a married man preferable to becoming 'public property'
In Western society, it is common for a man to have mistresses and/or multiple extra-marital affairs, in which case, the woman leads a disgraceful, unprotected life. The same society, however, cannot accept a man having more than one wife, in which women retain their honorable, dignified position in society and lead a protected life. Thus the only two options before a woman who cannot find a husband is to marry a married man or to become 'public property'. Islam prefers giving women the honorable position by permitting the first option and disallowing the second. There are several other reasons, why Islam has permitted limited polygyny, but it is mainly to protect the modesty of women.

[Source: From the talk of Dr.Zakir Naik]




Good News

Through working together our hopes increase,
To live in a world, full of love and peace.....full of love and peace.

Dear visitors and team members of "The Guiding Friends" I am very much
pleased to tell you that we have got another author in our blog.
A sister of ours, Nur Sakinah Thomas Abdullah has joined us in the
guiding friends. I hope you will be happy to have a researcher as our
companion. Please visit her blog to know more about her.
Sister Nur Sakinah! Thank you very much for joining. Your arrival has
made our Eid-ul-Fitr and Ramadhan a really memorable one.
Ibn Hanif

Working Together

Photo Ibn Hanif


Sealing A Friendship For The Sake Of Allah

Sealing a friendship for the sake of Allah is based on true bond of love that exists between two people above worldly motives, gains and purposes. It is a relationship based on compassion, empathy, selflessness, honesty, trustworthiness and sincerity. It is indeed a high level of piety filled with genuine support and helping one another just for the sake of Allah. We must bear in mind that only those who love one another truly for the sake of Allah are ones who will earn a blessed reward from Allah.
Narrated by Mu`adh Bin Jabal [may Allah be pleased with him]: Allah's Messenger [Allah’s peace and blessings be upon him] said, "Allah, the Exalted, has said: “For those who love one another for the sake of My Glory, there will be seats of light (on the Day of Standing), and they will be envied by the Prophets and Martyrs".

Ibn Abbas said: "No one may taste true faith except by this (i.e. building relationships for Allah's sake), even if his prayers and fasts are many. People have come to build their relationship around the concerns of the world, but it will not benefit them in any way."

Sealing a friendship for the sake of Allah is always a responsibility and never an opportunity as it is more than an ordinary friendship. In friendship for the sake of Allah we have sharing and giving, loving and caring, forgiving and respecting, Living a life overflowing with love for the sake of Allah, helping one another in good deeds with a selfless attitude and without causing hurt and displeasure, joining together to uphold the dignity of Islam in peace and harmonious way, bringing one another closer to Allah to seek His Mercy and Love always.

A scholar has said: "To seal a friendship for Allah's sake indicates the obligation of establishing relationships of love and trust for His sake; this is a friendship for the sake of Allah. It also indicates that simple affection is not enough here; indeed what is meant is a love based upon alliance. This entails assistance, honour, and respect. It means being with those whom you love both in word and deed."
Narrated by Abu Dharr Ghifaari [may Allah be pleased with him]: Allah's Messenger [Allah’s peace and blessings be upon him] said: "The best of deeds is to love for the sake of Allah and to hate for the sake of Allah".
[Sunan Abu Dawood: 4582]

Are we worried when our brothers or sisters face difficulties? Do we support our friends’ welfare and do we pray for them when they face adversity? Do we advice our lost sisters who expose their a’uraat, and our lost brothers to restrain from sinful lust. Allah made the believers as brothers and sisters so that they have mercy upon one another; so that they love one another; so that they help one another and support one another. This is how Muslims should be.

Anas Bin Malik [may Allah be pleased with him] narrated that a desert Arab said to Allah's Messenger [Allah’s peace and blessings be upon him]: “When will be the Last Hour?” Allah's Messenger said: “What preparation have you made for it?” Thereupon he said: “I love Allah and His Messenger”. Thereupon he (Allah's Messenger) said: “You will be with the one you love”.
[Sahih Muslim: Book 32, Number 6378]

May Allah forgive us and place us in the group of people who truly love each other for the sake of Allah and May Allah forgive us and bless our friendship for the sake of Allah

Imam Shafi'i :"I accompanied the Sufi people and I received from them three knowledges: ... how to speak; .. how to treat people with leniency and a soft heart... and they... guided me in the ways of Sufism." [Kashf al-Khafa, 'Ajluni, vol. 1, p 341.]

Imam Ghazzali : "I knew verily that Sufis are the seekers in Allah's Way, and their conduct is the best conduct, and their way is the best way, and their manners are the most sanctified. They have cleaned their hearts from other than Allah and they have made them as pathways for rivers to run receiving knowledge of the Divine Presence." [al-Munqidh, p. 131].

Still learning to be a good friend for the sake of Allah.
Lahaula wala quwwata illa billahil aliyul azeem
with love and du'a,
~sister sakinah~


The Most Honorable of You in The Sight of Allah

Allah the Exalted said: 0 mankind! We have created you from a male and a female, and made you into nations and tribes, that you may know one another. Verily the most honorable of you in the Sight of Allah is that (believer) who has At-Taqwa i.e., one of the Muttaqun: i.e., pious and righteous persons who fear Allah much (abstain from all kinds of sins and evil deeds which He has forbidden),and love Allah much (perform all kinds of good deeds
which He has ordained). Verily Allah is All-Knowing, All-Aware. "
Surah 49: 13


Alhamdulillah (Praise be to Allah).




No Burden on a Soul Beyond its Ability to Bear

"On no soul do We place a burden greater than it can bear: before Us is a record wich clearly shows the truth: they will never be wronged."
The Holy Quran (23:62)

"And those who believe and do good - We do not impose on any of them a burden beyond his capacity."
The Holy Quran (7:42)

Narrated Abu Huraira(R.A):
While we were sitting with the Prophet (Peace be upon him)a man came and said,
O Allah's Apostle(Peace be upon him)!
"I have been ruined."
Allah's Apostle (Peace be upon him) asked what was the matter with him.
He replied, "I had sexual intercourse with my wife while I was fasting."
Allah's Apostle (Peace be upon him) asked him "Can you afford to manument a slave?"
He replied in the negative.
Allah's Apostle (Peace be upon him) asked him,"Can you fast for two successive months?"
He replied in the negative.
The Prophet (Peace be upon him) asked him, "Can you afford to feed sixty poor persons?"
He replied in the negative.
The Prophet (Peace be upon him) kept silent and while we were in that state, a big basket full of dates was brought to the Prophet (Peace be upon him). He asked,"Where is the questioner?"
He replied,"I (am here)."
The Prophet (Peace be upon him) said to (him), "Take this(basket of dates) and give it in charity."
The man said, "Should I give it to a person poorer than I?
By Allah; there is no family betwen it's (i.e Madina's) two mountains who are poorer than I."

The Prophet (Peace be upon him) smiled till his pre-molar teeth became visible and then said,
"Feed your family with it."

[Bukhari, Book#31 Fasting]


Fasting, Quran and the Month of Ramadan

O you who believe! fasting is prescribed for you, as it was prescribed for those before you, so that you may learn self-restraint.
For a certain number of days; but whoever among you is sick or on a journey, then (he shall fast) a (like) number of other days; and those who are not able to do it may effect a redemption; by feeding a poor man; so whoever does good spontaneously it is better for him; and that you fast is better for you if you know.

The month of Ramadan is that in wich Quran was revealed, a guidance to men and clear proofs of the guidance and the distinction; therefore whoever of you is present in the month, he shall fast therein, and whoever is sick or upon a journey, then (he shall fast) a (like) number of other days; Allah desires ease for you, and He does not desire for you difficulty (He desires) that you should complete the number and that you should exalt the greatness of Allah for His having guided you and that you may give thanks.

And when My servants ask you concerning Me, then surely I am very near; I answer the prayer of the suppliant when he calls on Me, so they should answer My call and believe in Me that they may walk in the right way.

It is made lawful for you to go into your wives on the night of the fast; they are an apparel for you and you are an apparel for them; Allah knew that you acted unfaithfully to yourselves, so He has turned to you (mercifully) and removed from you(this burden); so now be in contact with them and seek what Allah has ordained for you, and eat and drink until the whiteness of the day become distinct from the blackness of the night at dawn, then complete the fast till night, and have not contact with them while you keep to the mosques; these are the limits of Allah, so do not go near them. Thus does Allah make clear His communications for men that they may learn self-restraint.

Meanings of the Quran
Surah: Al-Baqarah (The Cow)
Verses: 183-187



Narrated Aisha (R.A) : (the wife of the Prophet (Peace be upon him) )

A lady along with her two daughters came to me asking me (for some alms), but she found nothing with me but one date wich I gave to her and she divided it with her two daughters, and then she got up and went away. Then the Prophet (Peace be upon him) came in and I informed him about this story. He said,

"Whoever is in charge of (put to test by) these daughters and treets them generously, then they will act as a shield for him from the (Hell) fire. "

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